In Part 1, I shared the story of meeting my new husband, Greg … the everyday “Coles Notes” version, as it were.
Then I began to delve into what really happened … the much more intriguing and revealing “story behind the story,” including …
My intuitive connection with my Higher Self that convinced me I would marry again … and very likely by age 50.
My enlistment of the Law of Attraction, detailing the 46 criteria I was looking for in a new life partner.
Messages from Spirit, including from a psychic medium confirming she saw a marriage in my future, likely 3 years from when Ron died, and that we’d both know quickly.
The Universe’s active role in all this … getting me to this Fairwinds community and orchestrating an attention-grabbing out-of-left-field invitation to a party.
At the end of Part 1, I’d just left this party … not having the slightest idea why it had been important to attend.
Another invitation arrives … also unexpected
A few weeks later, I got a phone call … again, out of the blue. This time, it was Greg. Oh, hi. Emboldened by our conversation at the birthday party, he wanted to know if I was interested in joining him in a local golf tournament coming up at the end of the month.
I was still nervous about giving the wrong impression to this newly-single guy, but his invitation sounded innocent enough. In fact, it would actually be nice to have someone to golf with. My close friends weren’t golfers, so generally I was left to play with whomever else showed up for the tee time.
We talked about trying to arrange a walk together ahead of time, so we’d have a chance to get to know each other a little bit before the tournament. However, our schedules didn’t align … he had other “very important” priorities, like golf and fishing. Apparently, getting to know me was NOT one of them! Harrumph!
Well, just as well, all things considered … but a girl likes to have the opportunity to be the one to say, no, you know?
So, the day of the tournament comes … May 31st. Another couple, whom Greg knew, was paired with us to make up our foursome. My guard still up, I was wary as we headed out, but it turned out to be all golf … nothing exceptional, but fun and good to get out.
As is typical of golf tournaments, the round was followed by a dinner and prizes. Members of each foursome were seated together, along with another foursome, to make a table of eight.
I sort of knew a couple of the other players, but that’s it. So, I was taken aback when I sat down, and Greg circled around to the other side of the table … to sit beside another woman … and proceed to spend the rest of the evening ignoring me and talking with her! Yet another harrumph!
Obviously, he had no interest in me for anything other than … well, I wasn’t sure what. And my guard started to relax.
Off to Chicago … for an unexpected message
A week or so later, in early June, my friend Monica and I headed off to a spirituality conference in Chicago … Celebrate Your Life. It was fabulous! World-renowned spiritual leaders and psychic mediums were speaking, and we soaked it up.
During one of the breaks, I ended up in conversation with a fellow attendee, Elliott. He claimed to have mediumistic abilities … you know, allowing him to connect with the Other Side.
We had a nice chat … I told him about Ron, sharing that he’d died less than two years earlier, and also talked about my energy healing practice.
Elliott used his abilities to “tune in” and told me some things he perceived about me … in particular, how my healing abilities and spiritual leadership would develop more strongly in the future. That was cool.
Later in the day, he stopped me in the hallway between sessions. He told me he’d tried to connect with Ron after our discussion and felt he’d been successful.
“Obviously, he’s okay, in a very special place, not bothered by anything. He really wants you to find someone – that’s very important to him.”
This wasn’t a particularly surprising message, and frankly, could apply to just about any woman who’d lost her husband, but it was nice of Elliott to have made the effort and pass it on.
I politely thanked him and turned to leave, when he stopped me. He had one more message to share …
“He said you’re to ‘get a dog.’ ”
HAH! Yeah, that definitely wasn’t Ron! The fur-kids who’d absolutely run our life were cats … we were both head over heels in love with them. I knew Ron had had a dog earlier in his life, long before we met, but this had never been a consideration for us.
I told Elliott as much, telling him he must be mistaken … Nope, sorry, Ron would never say that.
Friends first …
After returning home from the conference, I connected once more with Greg and introduced him to Monica, who was also single. They had a lot in common and I thought they might hit it off. Maybe even romantically ….
Greg then introduced us to a young woman who’d lost her husband too, and she introduced us to a fellow who was divorced … and the five of us hung around a bit.
It was incredibly refreshing to find a cadre of singles in this couples’ community. As a single woman, especially in later life, it can be easy to find other single women to socialize with, but single men? That’s a different story.
I found I missed the “male energy” that a man brings into a group … nothing sexual, just a different way of being and thinking. So, it was refreshing having a mixed group, and we had fun together.
My friend Joan would periodically ask me how things were going with Greg, and I would confidently assure her, “Oh, we’re just friends. I mean I’m fond of him, but that’s absolutely all it is.”
Until it wasn’t …
Yeah. Suddenly one day, things changed ….
It was August 15th … two and a half months after the golf tournament. Greg and I were playing a round of golf together, as we’d done from time to time during that period.
We’d been paired up with a couple of guys, one of whom worked occasionally at the golf club, so we knew him to see him.
At one point during the round, we made it known that Greg and I were competing against each other, and this fellow challenged us to come up with a prize for the winner. Not something we’d done before, but okay.
A weighty wager was selected … a glass of wine was now on the line!
By the end of the round, I had eked out a victory. In order to “pay up,” Greg suggested a change of venue … back to his nearby house where he had good quality wine. I’d been there once or twice before, so sure, why not?
“You’ll both know quickly … “
It was that evening when the nature of our relationship took a sudden change. To be fair, in recent days I’d actually begun to muse about the whole “friends with benefits” concept and was open to a more intimate connection. But then Greg took my breath away …
He kissed me and informed me that he intended to marry me.
Um, uh, uh … WHAT??!!
I was dumbstruck … you know, mouth open, jaw on the floor … no words coming out. (Ah, so this is what “speechless” feels like ….)
I mean, it hadn’t been too long before this that I’d been trying to set him up with Monica, for heaven’s sakes! After all, he was several years older and I was absolutely not going down that path again.
Okay, sure … he was definitely young of mind and young of heart. Um, truth be told, he was actually younger in that way than I was. I’d become a bit of an old lady in my marriage to Ron.
But Greg? He was totally irreverent, still harboured a rebellious streak from his days as a university student activist, was in touch with the current music and fashion trends of the day, and loved to play. He ran or hiked every day … golfed … fished … snowboarded. In fact, it was I who almost had trouble keeping up with him!
For sure, I was attracted to him. But as a life partner? Wow, I hadn’t given that a single thought … not one.
In fact, reading back through my journals to write this post, I noticed that Greg isn’t even mentioned until August 2nd… just 13 days earlier. He’d come by to support me in a Club Championship golf tournament and I’d noted how much I appreciated it.
So, nope, this wasn’t on my radar … not one bit.
I countered his proposed intention with the whole “friends with benefits” idea and he gave me a look like I was crazy. Nope, that’s not what he had in mind at all.
In a state of confusion (or maybe shock … ), I promised to think about it.
Which I did.
And it took exactly 12 days for my conscious mind to catch up to where I suddenly realized my subconscious mind had been all along ….
Well, not exactly my subconscious mind because that’s the one that messes with us, storing problematic “childhood programming” and all those limiting beliefs we spend a lifetime overcoming.
No, what I really mean is my superconscious mind … my inner being, my Higher Self … the deep-down part of me that knows what’s good for me. That’s the part of me that was waiting for the “conscious me” to catch up. And when it did, the answer was obvious …
Yes, yes … of course I will marry you!
“Get a dog … “ – message from Spirit (via Elliott)
With friends and family to consider, Greg didn’t want to rush a wedding, so we waited a year. But we were ready to be together, so in early November, he moved in with me.
And along with some furniture, he brought Satchmo … his beloved black Lab.
Yup! Apparently, I’d gotten a dog ….
(Side note: This connection to Elliott’s message in Chicago didn’t occur to me for months. I truly regret not being able to follow up with him to let him know he was right and I was the one who was wrong.
Be aware this will happen in mediumship readings … be patient if something doesn’t seem to fit. Sure, sometimes the medium’s just wrong … they’re human, after all … but often, you’ll figure it out later, or, as in this case, it will unfold in time.)
“Within 3 years … “ – message from Spirit (via Deborah)
The next fall, we slipped away to the west coast of Vancouver Island, to the surfing community of Tofino, to get married on a beach overlooking the Pacific Ocean.
It was a moving ceremony, held on October 10, 2010 … 3 years and 1 month after Ron died.
“By age 50 … “ – message from Spirit (via my intuition)
Two months after we were married, I celebrated my 50th birthday.
With my new husband whom I’d met in this small, remote community of Fairwinds … on the outer west coast of Canada, on an island in the Pacific.
The Universe’s plan fell into place with ease … well, sort of
From the moment I agreed to marry Greg, I was hooked, and knew this was the right thing to do.
Or at least, I thought I did ….
What I didn’t know was that something inside of me … hiding just out of sight … wasn’t quite so sure.
Yeah, this time, it was my subconscious mind. And before we said, “I do,” it would come bursting forth ….
More on that part of the story to come.